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Thas' right, just bring yo' janky-ass box down here -- we'll get that mutha hardwired up to our phat-azz pipes to da 'net so's yo stanky-ass can start p1mping packets like it ain't no thing. We be colocatin' yo' shiznick for cheep . Ain't like nobody else gonna host yo' janky-ass box, what wid all that shit hangin' outta it.
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We gots mad racks, just like dem haughty-taughty uptight "Colocation companies" so's so you can mount your stolen rack gear with ours -- and
there's nothing our phat-azz routers can't handle and we be firewalled like a bad-ass motherfscker. Back da fsck off for I bust a cap in yo' router, foo! We even got yo' shit locked down tite -- no jackin' here, 'cept for that crazy guy down da hall -- check out this killer attack snake we gotz. We don't need no fuckin' rottweillers here -- we got Willy The Crackhed -- and that motherfucker's packin' heat!
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Speaking of packin' heat, y'all knowz we all up on that Quake-type shit, right? Nuthin' better than making bang-bang noises, lis'nin to gansta-rap, and watching virtual bootie bounce around. Check out our game server, if that bitch-ass f00l ever gets the motherfucker back up. Tito, REPRESENT!
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And, if you scary-ass can't afford that ritzy shiznick (like you could anyway), we got mad servers you can host on -- just leave the pr0n alone, or we'll show up to yo pad and take your bill outta yo bitch's ass, or burn your crib down.
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Remember, olla our shit's backupped like a motherfscker with not just one, but two phat-ass generators -- check 'em out! One, Two. Yah, so what if they're stolen.. (that one with no tires took some work -- we just stoled some tires off of ya mama's trailer to get it home!)
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And it's all locked down like a beeyatch in our top-sekret bunker. Ain't nobody touching our shit -- an' living to tell about it. (PS: That chair is the one L-dog got head in!)
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So, if y'allz want to colo a little sumin' sumin', dropz us a line. But remember -- we gotz to get paid.
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Ghetto-Colo.COM
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We be trickin' bitz out all ova' da innanet! Shouts out to all my homies on @ghetto -- y'all know what it's about! We're the #1 Ghetto Colo over at Google.com. Props to y'all for making it happen! Peace, Imouttahere....
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One last comment:
Got donut, cop? :-P
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